Sunday, February 22, 2009

Creating Change

Imagine what your life would be like if you always did what you wanted to do?

What I have concluded is that too many times people base their decisions on two types of reasoning; they make decisions based on what they think other people perceive them as and they do it for the benefit of somebody else. So theoretically, few times do people ever act in their own interest.

Social conditioning proves to be a very strong influence over people and their decisions. Why people act the way they do and why we have acted in such ways for such a long time has become interesting to me. Like any problem, you figure out whats wrong with it and do your best to fix it. So how to you fix the problem if the problem is you?

In my opinion, authenticity is an admirable trait. Somebody's truthfulness to themselves has allowed them to live every moment as the full expression of themselves. Imagine how much happier you’d be if you stopped doing things that other people thought were cool, and started living every moment as the full expression of who you are.

It is uncomfortable and I'm not saying I'm original because I have been shaped by culture in so many ways. I am for from original, but I do feel some sense of freedom acknowledging that I am not. It can be a step from freeing myself from something that "I" am not. In the past there have been many things that I congenitally didn't feel was myself but did them anyway. Dressed a certain way, acted a certain way, ate a certain way, ect in an attempt to fit in and these things have shaped me into what people perceive me as today. It is now to the point of, "who gives a shit."

These actions (or lack of) were governed in large part from social conditioning. Not caring what other people think may be the biggest factor to making your own decisions. Accept that it is a problem in your life and that you act the way people perceive you to act, dress, speak, ect. Once you realize how you are perceived, it is easier to see what you are not. These presumptions of what others think of you is what is holding you back from your greatest potential. Placing a label on yourself and others only limits who you actually are. Labels are preventing you from doing the things you really want to do because you're to busy worrying about what other people will perceive you as and will look down on you because of your efforts.

It is a hard truth to accept but the only person you need acceptance from is yourself. You are the one who validates your thoughts and who has to live with those thoughts. You chose to read my blog because you want to (hopefully) not because you want to feel acceptance from me. Hopefully it can add some value to your day. For whatever reason, you should do it because it pleases you. If not, stop reading. You’re here for a reason because you choose to have a reason to be here.

I am still trying to figure out who "I" am, what I believe in and why I believe it. It is hard to justify whether or not I am just listening to another source or actually thinking for myself. One argument can be that instead of listening to a medical doctor's opinion I am listening to a Chiropractors opinion. Either way they are not thoughts of my own. In some ways this argument is true, we are all fooled by propaganda. One difference is that some expose themselves to multiple sides of the story while others are limited to one side. More exposure leads to more thoughts and more opportunities to create your own opinion. I have seen and experienced both sides and chosen what is best for me.

Above knowledge is feeling. Its not about what you say (you can hide the truth from people) but how you feel. You cannot hide this from yourself. Listen to your emotions. Does positive reinforcement from yourself feel good or are you constantly waiting for the approval of others? Are you approval dependent? Do you wish you had somebody else's life? What feelings do you get when you say what you feel?

The most adrenaline-pumping risk you can take in life is to be yourself. Caring what other people think will ensure you live a small life. The biggest risk we can take is to not risk being who we really are. You owe it to yourself to be authentic.


Andrew Gregg said...

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Every time we choose safety, we reinforce fear(and all too often the status quo). Our biggest fear is not death, it is taking the risk to be alive -- the risk to be alive and express what we really are. Too many people are thinking of security instead of opportunity, the opportunity to grow. They seem to be more afraid of life than death. Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live. We gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face. We must do the things which we think we cannot do. Life is lived in the unknown.

I have been thinking lately, why are we so afraid of being wrong? The whole concept of being wrong has such a negative connotation. Why do we not rejoice in the fact that in being wrong, we are in some way presented with truth. Removing this view of 'wrongness' nothing in life is to be feared. It is only to be understood. This is a powerful thing indeed.

It is so amazing to see you create your own path Wes. "When we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

It is so exciting to see you go out on a limb in life and encourage others to do the same! That's where the fruit is!

UK Purcells said...

Great writing WES! It definitely added value to my day :)

Gene said...

glad to see other young people reading Radical Honesty